Monday 12 January 2009

The circle of trust.

Once again, as a human being, i feel the need to express myself.To make you think.And once again,life has taught me something i thought i could share with you.So, do try to bear with me for the next five minutes of your life which i will be oh so happy to waste.
The matter at hand is the circle of trust,our beloved people, friends,relatives,family.Some people were lucky enough to be born under the illusion of having many of them around.Others were smarter and promptly came to terms with the idea they actually had only two,best case scenario.When i grew old enough to think,i was under the impression only a bunch of people really cared about me.This idea slowly grew on me and as time passed, that feeling only got stronger.But the tides always seem to find a way to turn and just recently the Balance found a way to prove me wrong.And what a way it found! I will not go into details, i will just try to offer you the gist of my thoughts leaving you with the hard task of deciphering my words.(You should know by now that i take a twisted pleasure in doing this.)
Which are the criteria we use when we want to decide whether someone cares about us or not? Is it his attitude? Is it the kind acts he does for us? Is it his/her sense of humor? Or maybe it's a mixture of all these values....who knows?
I do. I am positive that you are thinking it's a combination of all the above.Well, i hate to break it to you stranger, but here's the tragic irony; Although you may believe that you are different (like everybody else :P) in reality the deciding factor on you calling someone a friend, is how much of a normal person he is, how rationally he reacts and responds in a given situation.And if the said person is the soul of the party, well you don't need to know anything else about him.Your struggle to add him to your circle of friends can begin.And i don't blame you.All we crazy people think everyone else is crazy, so we have to be careful not to interact with any crazy people by accident, lest we become crazy ourselves.Yeah.It's sad.So, let me tell you a secret.Try to get to know people who think you are out of your mind and criticize you all the time.Become their friend.For they have already done the first step to a good relationship.They have told you your flaws.They have been honest to you.In most cases,your best friend will never be so honest.And that is because he is your best friend and he knows you won't like it.No one likes criticism after all, it makes sense.
All in all, try to be with people who are aware of your flaws and have insulted you for them,have come to terms with them, and love you for them.For me, if someone can't predict when his words will anger me, or can't understand even my most paranoid needs, he is not really my friend.When someone tells me "don't do this, it is just not right" i die a little bit inside.Because i then know he doesn't know me so well.
Remember stranger, our individuality should never be compromised or be trifled with.The moment a friend doubts your actions, is the moment he should no longer be called a friend.A friend will bail you out of jail, but a GOOD friend will sit next to you in the cell's bench and say; "Dude we fucked up".

Your glum guy out.

1 comment:

John said...

Hello Vassilis, i have been reading your blog for a while and i decided to answer to your last post.
I strongly believe in friendship, as i find it one of the greatest feelings and one of the most important things in one's life.
I feel the need,though, to separate friendship from tha thing our modern societies call socialisation. Socialising is a tendency people have, caused either by necessity or vanity...
A social accuaintance will be very careful with his behaviour towards you,since he does not and may not want to have a solid view of your character, yoyr believes,your values,your ideas and your inner needs....
A true friend,on the other side,will have a straight idea about all these mentioned above and therefore he has the right to advise you and try to guide you when you get out of the track.
A true friend of course is familiar with your flaws and have come to terms with them...but this does not mean that a true friend will not critisize your mistakes and your wrong choices. Coming to terms with one's flaw is the first necessary step to a friendship, understanding the reason and the substance of the flaws is the second and trying to help your friend overcome them is the third.
Actually advising a friend is not a right,but am obligation of the true friend!
One's individuality is very important of course,but real friendship overlaps even this,because what else is real friendship than sharing everything?
So individuality is important,but also overrated and it cannot stand in the way of real friendship Vassilis
With respect John

 
Vasilis Siouchleris

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